Thursday, October 25, 2007
Religion and morality
Can one be moral without being religious? This is something that I was talking about to some co-workers tonight and it got me thinking. While I am not a fan of organized religion, I did grow up going to church. At this point I do not attend a church or any other type of religious service on a regular basis and neither does my family (I am basically a deist with Buddhist leanings and my wife is an agnostic, and neither of us like getting up on Sunday mornings). So I guess my question is, are my kids missing out by not attending religious services? While I do not believe the morality comes from religion (I see much of religion as an expression of morality) I now wonder a bit if maybe my kids should be exposed to some more religion (that having been said, you should see the huge collection of Veggie Tales DVD’s in our house). Definitely something to think about… I’d love to get some input/opinions on the subject.
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12 comments:
Good question dave... great points.
Having raised two of the finest human beings on the planet (my kids), we are the sum total of our experiences combined with our emotional reaction to those experiences.
I think you do want to include among those experiences... some that teach morals as the focal point to your children. Church certainly does just that.... and nowhere else on the block does, including the school.
To think that a void of morality will envoke higher morality... is an experiment in disaster.
Having said that, balance is the key.
Yes, I think a person can be moral without being religious in any way.
But a person needs a compass or benchmark to navigate "right and wrong" since we (humans) can justify practically anything we desire to do.... logic is part of that, but with no map...logic is lost and wandering.
In my opinion...of course.
deep thoughts... by red s tater,
"MAP? We don't need no stinkin' map"...!
Do you think your kids require, or could benefit from, the superstition that is required for participating in religious services? They may learn some rules for good behavior, but they have a cost.
If you believe it is superstition and take your kids to church anyway... you deserve the parent of the year award.
So, my answer would be yes, it is worth it...(if that's what you believe) everything has a cost my friend...except hillarycare that is...it's FREE !
sorry about that hillary shot dave (off topic) ...on superstition(s).
Will you prevent your children from ever knowing about any superstitions... I doubt it since if you are like most people...you are probably superstitious about something... or have been in the past.
So, if religion is a mere 'superstition'[sic]... (superstitions are harmless, right?) then where is the harm or "cost" in them learning about one more 'superstition'?
over?
One of my favorite verses, Lefty, is this, Proverbs 22:6. "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."
Dave, I'm not married, don't have the rugrats yet. But I am not ashamed to say that I attend church every Sunday. You know yourself that I have a soft spot for Buddhism too.
For I see nothing wrong in believing in something larger, greater, with more grace, than "man".
I suspect somewhere in you too, there is that belief in such a wonderful and loving G-D. And if, in a slight knowing of Him, wouldn't that be a spendid gift to give your children too?
No matter how much you love those two kiddies, Dave, a far greater love is that for you, me, Red, even anonymous, that our Creator has for us all.
Hope that helps, and hope I didn't go off.
Lefty, I'm like you. I was raised in church(es) and while I feel I believe I am a Christian I now find myself leaning more to a Deist point of view. My husband however considers himself Christian but we don't attend a church regularly. We also like to sleep in on Sundays ;)
We have three young children and we have been wrestling with the right way to expose them to religion--and just how much we want them to be exposed to. We've had bad experiences with organized religion. We try to keep things simple around here. The Golden Rule, some key stories from the Bible that form the foundation of Christianity... But it's difficult to know for sure that you are doing what is right for your family when you are responsible for raising three little souls.
Since my grandfather's death last April, my mother has returned to church with my grandmother--she hadn't gone regularly since I was a young kid. And I find that I am happy that on the occasional weekend that my children spend with her they attend church with her. There are things they can learn in church with my mother and grandmother (rules of behavior, traditions, etc) that are difficult to teach in other environmnets.
I guess all this is to say that what you are questioning is a common parental theme. We are going through these questions in our house too. We just do the best we can with what we believe is best for us as individuals and as a family.
This is a tough one for me too. I did not grow up attending church, but I do now as an adult. My worry is that I'm foisting off my beliefs on my children, which I do not want to do. Since my husband and I do enjoy attending church on Sunday and it's illegal to leave our children home alone, I'm still taking them. I've come to the conclusion that as long as I teach them to be good people and to make personal decisions according to what their own conscience dictates, they will ultimately reach their own conclusions about their religious beliefs regardless of what mine are.
This "hands off" policy toward our own children is the cause of most of the problems teens face today.
"My worry is that I'm foisting off my beliefs on my children, which I do not want to do."
If we (as parents) don't believe enough in our beliefs to "foist them off on our children" then they aren't really beliefs at all.
The problem (as I see it) is that parents take this approach too often which leads children to find meaning and answers from others who are not so inclined to be looking out for their best interest...as a parent is...or at least should be.
Take a poll or draw names or whatever but pick a set of values and teach it to your children and let them decide on their own if you are full of BS or not later... not the other way round.
-red
It would seem to me that there is a strong thread of people who believe they can pick and choose what they want from Christianity or the Bible and leave the rest...such as we observe the Golden Rule and the 10 suggestions, (I mean Commandments)but I don't want to go to church or practice anything else that may take some effort on my part. To me that's like saying I want a hamburger, but leave out the meat and the bun...or give me a snickers, but leave out the peanuts and caramel.
As far as people leaving church or becoming jaded against religion because of some bad events...well, has your car ever broken down on you? Have you ever gotten a screwed up order at McDonalds? Have you ever been overcharged at Wal*Mart? I am guessing yes, and I am also guessing that more than likely, you still drive a car, go to McDonalds and shop at walmart. People fail to realize that while we worship a Supreme Creator, the LORD GOD, we are still human and screw up. The entire essence of the bible is forgiveness and some of us need to practice a little more.
I think the only ones who fail to realize we are all humans and will fall short of the 10 "suggestions" and the teachings of God and the Bible... are those people who criticize others for being religious and therefore hypocritical for not living up to standards that God himself has said cannot be achieved my man.
As parents, we owe our children a set of values and rules with which to deal with society and life. You can either make something up from scratch or go with written scripture and religious belief.
But to leave it up to our children to decide for themselves is like letting them decide for themselves whether it's safe to play in the street without teaching them what cars are.
disaster in the making.
-red
It is definitely possible to be moral without being religious.
But as someone who is very involved in church, let me say: don't make the moral education the business of someone else. You do need to talk about your beliefs rather than take your kids to something in which you do not believe.
Justice. Peace. Love of your fellow man and woman. Being willing to sacrifice for the sake of others. Gratitude for all the wonderful things in one's life.
All important attitudes to me, and they can be modelled in my clasroom without crossing that line into pushing my beliefs down someone else's throat, which I resent having happen to me.
Consider going to First Unitarian in OKC.
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